Daily Advice

Doubting your Relationship?

Getting into a relationship is like getting on a roller coaster. With all the ups and downs that you have to go through, it can be pretty tough to manage it all with calmness. The beginning is often very charming and calm, everything’s all colourful and bright but as time passes, people tend to move away from each other emotionally.

It may be because most couples don’t keep appreciating their partners and do little things to make them feel special as they used to do in the beginning. The energy in the relationship slowly starts fading away and so does the love. Both of them start feeling less important, less loved and this starts bothering them.

Another situation that is also commonly seen is that the bond and partnership of the couple do strengthen significantly over time, but some other factors that are beyond their control and manage, force them to part their ways. These factors can be troublesome exes, financial crises, unexpected chronic illness, etc.

However, regardless of what the reason or situation is, letting go of someone you wanted to spend your whole life with is hard. It is not only hurtful because the person you loved and cared for the most is no longer yours, but also because you aren’t confident and you keep doubting and asking yourself if this was the right thing for both of you. Many overwhelming questions similar to “Should I really break up? Should I wait? Is this the only option left for us? Will I be able to live without him/her? How will I recover from all this? etc arise. And you are left in a very complicated place where you’re unable to make a decision.

Just know that all of this is completely normal and, that one only breaks up the relationship when living together becomes very painful and is no longer an option.

So to make the best decision, give your mind some rest. A relaxed mind is much better at decision making than a tensed one. Once your mind is fresh, start writing down all the reasons that are troubling you and take your time when doing this. Then see whether or not they’re problematic enough and can they be solved without having to part ways or not. Also, write down all the positive points. This is necessary for terms of weighing the positives and negatives. Then discuss it all with your partner and tell them what you’re thinking and how. Also, discuss it with your family and try to take their advice on this. Once enough time and thought are put into it, make a decision and try sticking to it. It can be hard but just remember why you’re doing this.

If you break up, try to indulge yourself in new activities that you love, hang out with friends more, and remember to take care of yourself in this critical time.

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