In a room full of people, I find myself all alone.
I’ve been feeling very lonely for a long time. I don’t even remember what it feels like to be loved and cared about. I’ve faced rejection in one form or another ALL my life!
These days, unfortunately, I’m at my worst. I have seen many problems till now and have managed to handle them somehow, but with all these pandemic situations and mess around me, it’s very difficult for me to stay positive. These tough times seem to pull me in a hole of darkness and depression and I’m clueless as to how I should handle this and keep myself from losing my mind.
I’ve read it in several places that talking to someone about your problems can greatly reduce depression. But I don’t trust people due to good reasons. I’ve found them not worthy of my trust in the past as they’ve ended up sharing my problems with other people or even worse, mislead me. They don’t take me seriously at all and think this is all drama.
But I think it’s the only solution to my problems. I need to tell someone about what I’m going through. I‘ll start seeing a therapist soon.. when this COVID situation eases a bit. Or maybe I’ll just start online sessions. I haven’t decided it yet.